A Few unsaid things

A lot has beeing going on lately, and I feel I just can't keep up! And part of it is just the overwhelming brain I have. I have about a billion MORE things that go through my mind "to do" that getting anything done seems to come second only to THINKING about getting it done! Does this even make any sense?

First of all I finished the wedding. I actually photographed my first wedding. I cried all day. The Bride was gorgeous and she is such a soft spot in my heart. I was so happy to get to spend the day with her on such a special occasion. However, I didn't think the pictures went as I had planned them in my head. I knew it as I was taking them. We just didn't think things through as much as I thought. I had a detailed list of poses, and didn't get some that I thought were most important. Her flowers didn't come until after the couple pictures, so she had no pictures of her and her husband and her bouquet... which seemed so weird to me.

But overall, she does have some pretty shots... I was just so disappointed in myself. I really thought I would have done better. So as I looked at the shots, I cry each time, feeling like I failed her. I hope that there is that slim chance she is satisfied. Her photobook is gorgeous, so maybe that will seal it up.

Here are some of my favorites... I do have MANY more, but I will limit it to this.

This is Zech, my son, for those of you who haven't seen him in a long time... We had such an experience getting this tux on him. He hated getting measured, so they mismeasured (even when I said that I thought they did and that we needed to get it right!) So when the tux came in, it was double his size... his shirt was SO HUGE (even when I told her NOT to order a small 3 year old a size 5 shirt!). So we had to go back to try it on twice. Each time he screamed and cried and told us he would never wear it! I tried telling him it was a superhero outfit, and that Daddy would be wearing one too... nothing worked. Dave just decided to get him dressed. Just like anyother day, and Zech was fine with that. He said "I don't want to be a superhero!" Daddy said thats fine, just get dressed. So he gets his pants on, his ENORMOUS SHIRT on and then the tie-- "I don't want to be OPA!" (Opa wears ties to preach) (Opa is our name for Grandpa). Dave tells him he doesn't have to "What do you want to be?" Zech says "ZECH IN A TUX!" DUH!

Zech starts homeschool on September 2nd. I thought we had 2 weekends to finish up loose ends, but my parents will be here next weekend, so we have until next thursday. I am so nervous. I don't feel like he needs 2.5 hours of sit down and learn time at 3 years old. And if it weren't for his personality, I wouldn't start at 3. However, he is stubborn when he is forced to do something, so this year's goal is to introduce him to the "school" process, To have a time of structured play (even if its unstructured in a structured atmosphere), and to write his name! hehe! I really want to see him write his name. When I try to teach him in restaurants (on the kids menu) or when he is coloring, or on the computer, he is SO NOT interested! So, I just want to set up the room and make it interesting.

We have cleared a room in the basement, I have the weather wall, the calendar, the ABCs around the room (things I loved about studying elementary ed), I even have a chalk wall... just Zech and Lily's size! he has workbooks, and center activities. I am excited and VERY nervous! We start at 3 because I need the practice of patience and by trial and error learn what will help him learn when school actually counts. I homeschool not just because I am a complete control freak as I tease. I actually feel its my job. Being in the traditional schools means someone else is teaching him more hours a day than i am... and thats just not okay with me. he's too young to be sent out to deal with that. THIS IS MY CHOICE... and I am not knocking anyone else. I just feel like its my job to care for him, to teach him, to protect him.

So, I get a promotion! I am not JUST mommy now, I am a preschool teacher!

I'll post pics of the finished project of his school room! IF I ever get it done!